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He would just sit there and calmly catalogue my failings, and I couldn't fault him. He only had one character flaw that was of any significance so I used it to justify my unhappiness. That was the crossdressing.It was finally getting to be too much for him. He began to stay home from work a lot, and was on the cusp of losing his job due to his absenteeism. I didn't help him much since I felt a tiny bit of responsibility for his condition, so I lashed out at that too. He finally started going to a shrink. I thought, "Good, he is finally going to get the crossdressing thing fixed." Not surprisingly, he never mentioned it to the shrink. He truly didn't see it as the problem I did.Soon he had his absenteeism under control and was becoming more relaxed. I guess I had hurt him pretty bad when I had lashed out at him when he was vulnerable. He was always honest with me, even when it would hurt my feelings, but now he was being very honest. He had confessed to me one night after watching a. I think he’s afraid to get his hand pecked.The next stop was the stable where the horses and cows were. “Do you milk the cows, too?” Jimmy asked. “Normally grandpa does, I haven’t done that in years. I’m sure I know how, but that’s done in the morning.” I explained. Jimmy looked up and asked, “What’s up there?” “The hayloft. Grandpa and my uncles bale the hay or straw and put it up there for the winter months.” I started up the ladder telling Jimmy to follow me. When we reached the top of the barn, Jimmy took a deep breath of the smell. “I’ve always liked the smell of hay. Clover hay smells the best and it’s the softest.” I said as I picked up a handful and put it under Jimmy’s nose.“What do you mean the softest?” Jimmy looked puzzled, before I pushed him to land on a pile of hay. “Oh I see what you mean,” he laughed. I stood watching him roll around, then fell next to him as he tugged my leg. We laid next to each other kissing and talking. I told Jimmy that we can.
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